Friday, February 6, 2009

At the Checkout

I need to lighten the mood here on my blog. Things have been entirely too serious and sad for the past couple of weeks and I want people to enjoy visiting here, perhaps even get a giggle or two out of it. So this morning, my heart is feeling lighter and I have a hilarious story to share with you. 

I don't know how many of you know my husband. I have written a few stories about him in the past, how he is completely persnickety (quite the opposite of me), he is a hard worker, has no concept of time, and is darling and precious all the way down to his soul. One thing that has always fascinated me about this man is how he is so easily drawn in to gossip. He is not one to spread gossip but does he ever love a juicy story. We have people come and go from our farm frequently and if he ever hears a good story on someone, be they local or "foreign", he is always beaming with shameless delight as he tells me the details. 
Well, you can imagine how he must be drawn in at the checkout at Wal-Mart, bless his heart. Very rarely will the tabloids ever catch my eye. Aside from People magazine or anything with an eye catching food dish of some sort, I simply don't pay attention to the rhetoric. 
Here is the funny story. The other evening Rodney and I were at the checkout counter at Wal-Mart. Our buggy was pretty full of groceries and I began placing them on the conveyer belt while Rodney stood in a trance. I didn't really pay much attention to it until I realized that I had unloaded all the groceries myself without one bit of help from him...even lifting dog food bags off the bottom of the cart. When I made my way to the end and started loading the bagged groceries in the cart, I started to become a little perturbed that he was just standing there while I was doing everything myself. Now, I have done this little chore a million times on my own, but I thought since he was with me that he would at least attempt to help. I got out my checkbook and glared over at him. The poor thing was just standing there in stupor staring at the blazon opus of hollywood gossip before him. It was almost as if he had been hypnotized. Just a big ol' hairy redneck standing there looking at magazines at the Wal-Mart. Finally he caught my eye and headed my direction. I thought he would say "oh, sorry I wasn't helping", or "here let me get that for you". No, help wasn't offered nor an apology spoken. He simply stood before me (and the lady behind the check-out) and, as innocent as a child said, "Tom Cruise had plastic surgery." I nearly wet my pants, I was so hysterical. I laughed all the way to the car, kept giggling about it on the way home, and still giggle when I think of it now. 
It's funny how something as silly as that can bring me laughter. It is the best medicine. 

1 comment:

TLDR1440 said...

Boy, Rodney & I are kindred spirits! My kids have to keep reminding me, Mom -- the groceries!
- Martine