Wednesday, August 26, 2009

hay season



I awakened this morning feeling somewhat like I'd been hit by a bus. Rodney and I even will teasingly look at each other after several days of hard labor and say "bus??"

It is hay season on the farm. God grows the grass and we must harvest it and bale it to sustain our cattle through the winter. I have never been too crazy about "have to" stuff, but this is one chore that I really do enjoy. Probably because it is here for a brief season, and then it is done.
Rodney called me yesterday around 3:30, and told me to stop raking...I didn't even ask why, I was just so happy to have been freed from my rugged and bouncing prison that I turned the tractor around and headed home. I do love raking hay, but after three days of riding a tractor, your body starts to overrule your brain.

He later called to let me know that the belts on the baler broke. And, like I've spoken of before of our small town life, a friend is on his way this morning... baler in tow, to finish up the process.

As I was sleepily and sorely walking past the big glass door in the kitchen this morning, I couldn't help but stop and admire the un-baled wind-rows. There is just something about all that grass being neatly arranged over hills and valleys that makes my heart happy.

I am always very diligent to give credit where credit is due. See, I may have driven the machinery that so expertly sorted the hay, but that is about all I did. God grew the grass, He made the sunshine and the rain to fall upon the earth. He gave me a mind and body to be able to work and toil. Thus, I am merely a servant to the greater good of the earth. Farm life keeps one very closely in-tuned with nature, with the ways of the earth and her Creator.
Let him who boasts, boast in the Lord 1 Cor 1:31.

I may be the only person on this planet that finds this scene satisfying and heartwarming, but it is the very thing that God needed to show me this morning. It reminds me clearly of whom I serve, and gives me a joy for the life I lead.


Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Remembering

Taylor was only 18 months old when Kyle made his big entrance. I remember, at the time, thinking that having another baby right away was a good idea.

"They will be close when they get older" I told myself. "I'll still be young enough to enjoy my life when they grow up and leave", I reasoned.

Well, today Taylor started school as a junior and Kyle as a sophomore. The past 17 years of my life have shown me what love is all about. You just don't get the true picture until you have your own children. The day that this picture was taken is etched in my memory eternally, not because of bliss but because of sheer terror.

When I was left alone for the first time with Taylor and Kyle, my heart was overwhelmed with anxiety. "How in the world am I gonna do this? What have I gotten myself into? What in heaven's name was God thinking entrusting these souls to me?"

And now, now that they have become the glorious people that they are, I look back and miss them. I would NEVER go back and do it again, raising toddlers almost killed me...literally! But look how sweet they were.

Loving them now is as easy as ever. They are both incredible people and sometimes I glance over at them and wonder who these grown people are living in my house. I miss them when they're gone. There hasn't been a first-day-of-school, from pre-k until this very morning, when I haven't had that homesick, heart-wrenching feeling. I have to just sit and cry for a minute and look forward to them coming home.

They are close, like I predicted. They love each other and are great friends (although they fight like any teenage siblings). Whether or not I'll be able to enjoy my life when they leave, is a chapter yet to be written. For now, I'm going to enjoy every little minute that God grants me and try to live with no regrets. Giving my children their wings will be one of my most precious accomplishments of all.

Monday, August 17, 2009

Knowledge

I've always loved books, even though I'm not a big reader...there is just something so alluring and charming about a book. Last week, I went with Mom to Rich Mountain Community College in Mena so she could register for a class she's been wanting to take for years. Oral Communication. (That is a different blog entirely).

While we were on campus, Taylor and I popped into the college book store while Mom was finishing up her registration process. College book stores are one of my favorite places.

This book store is small, I mean it's Mena Arkansas people, but still offered enough pens, pencils, paper and other office supplies to lure me in.

Then low-and-behold, there before me was a whole table full of college books on sale for a DOLLAR a piece!! My heart nearly stopped.

I love a bargain almost as much as I love a good book.
This is what I made it out of there with. Taylor was convinced that I had lost my mind, especially when I started drooling and quivering with excitement. As I piled one book after another into my arms, she kept inching further and further away from me, pretending not to know me.

But, just look what I scored!
How could I NOT buy this book?
or this one? I was thinking to myself...I'll learn EVERY name of EVERY plant, and how to use them beneficially. My knowledge will be unsurpassed in my small circle and people will look to me for advice about how to care for their plants. (yeah right)
Words, words, words. How I love them so. Sometimes I randomly flip through my i pod dictionary and absorb a few definitions. It is always thrilling when one of my kids asks me what a specific word means. OHHH...I'll look it up and we can discuss this at length. They don't ask me this question nearly as much as they used to.
The Examined Life? You mean like, why am I here? Philosophy? Yes, I need this book. Did I mention that they were only a dollar??
I'm not really sure what this book is used to teach, but it had the words life and development upon the cover and it was also very pretty. I judge books by there cover even though I know I'm not supposed to.
Now this one, I wish I could hire somebody else to read for me and then take care of my personal finances for me. I figured that I could apply some of the financial theories and expertise in this book to my farm finances and now my soap business.

I really wish I could lay on the floor, put these books atop my head and absorb them into my brain. Along with my recent interest in aromatherapy, soap making, and attempting to memorize scripture...my brain is on overload. I'm just one of those people that always thinks I can do everything, then find myself exhausted and completely drained. The good thing about it is that, so far, I haven't given up trying.

Friday, August 7, 2009

Excitement

Well, today started off exciting and now has ended very exciting.
Rodney called me about an hour ago and announced that we had a baby Donkey. My heart leapt into my throat as Taylor and I scattered almost knocking each other down to get to the 4-wheeler.
Momma Donkey, or Ellie May, is still pretty skittish and didn't want us to get too close. I completely understood and kept my distance. It is times like this that I am completely in love with my zoom lens. Fighting the urge to run up to it and squish it's little neck and stroke those sweet donkey ears was almost more that I could bear.
We are pretty sure it's a girl. It was hard to tell from so far away but Rodney said he could tell so for now I'm trusting his expertise in this arena. As I was shooting pictures I kept thinking...that is one big baby. I'm glad I'm not a donkey.